sirnonamstell: remember when pete got a ticket
just-laff: egberts: if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket you are one of the great thinkers of our time
awkwardvagina: one time my friend asked me to make a playlist for a road trip because their car radio didnt work so i made one that consisted of 14 different versions of party in the usa and long story short im not trusted with bringing music anymore
rabioheab: are there actually people out there who make their beds every morning or is that just a myth
Imagine reading a book of all the lies that were told to you.
starksexual: i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it
fizzyginger: If Prince Charles’s ringtone isn’t I Just Can’t Wait to be King then what’s the point